So much of child-rearing is character training and little children need to learn to obey. They need to be trained to answer affirmatively to authority. So how do we go about helping a child learn to obey?
Positive parents appreciate the value of the word no. They depend on the word often, as they base decisions on their youngster's welfare, and not on how much he nags, pleads, sulks, even threatens until be gets a yes. "Love your kids enough to say no when needed," affirms Betty, mother of Judy and Rick from Missouri. "Yes can sometimes be the coward's way out."
My teenagers are fourteen and sixteen. We disagree constantly over curfew times. Any suggestions for establishing reasonable limits? And how can I ensure they'll be followed? - The Timekeeper
Dear Dr. Ray, My twin sons are age ten. They bicker and battle about one third of the time they're together. Is this normal, and what can I do about it? - The Referee
Dear Dr. Ray: My daughter is eight years old. She's always asking me to purchase or obtain something for her. I simply don't have the money and even if I did, I don't think I could satisfy her. - Running on empty
Dear Dr. Ray: My son is four years old. He's very lovable, but be has a temper that is explosive. I think big anger goes beyond normal bounds. He throws at least one tantrum a day. We're looking for ideas. - Shell shocked
Dear Dr. Ray: My son is ten years old. His teacher says he is quite capable of doing his schoolwork, but his grades are very poor. He seems to lack initiative. Is this a common problem? And what can I do to motivate him? - Tired of pushing
Dear Dr. Ray: My five children are ages fifteen, fourteen, eleven, nine and six. Their personalities are all very different. One thing they all do, though, is talk back. Its the source of most of our arguments.
There is a fine line between high self-esteem and conceit, and probably no one knows this better than Case Western Reserve University (Ohio) psychologist Roy Baumeister, who has studied the effects in fact, the dangers of high self-esteem.
The experts call them pampered children. To those who have to put up with them, theyre spoiled rotten. But thanks to some sage advice, they dont have to be that way.
